Saturday, October 18, 2008
My Epicness

My Epicness

(Note: Incoming Lala mode and long rant. You have been warned)

Goodbye Singapore.

Hellooooo Japan!

I used to say I wanted to die in Japan. I shall correct that now.

I WILL die in Japan... from lung cancer.

With cigarettes going dirt cheap at 320 yen (5 SGD) for a box of 20 Marlboro Ice Mints, I was all out to smoke my ass off.

Hotel room, bathtub, arcade, Macdonald's, pachinko parlours, restaurants and obscure corners of the streets. You name it, I smoked it.

Imagine stuffing yourself with sushi & sukiyaki with sake/beer in an air-conditioned restaurant and being able to smoke at the same time... I must be in heaven...

Hoppy - Jap beer which is mixed with half a mug of sake

Day 1

So, going backwards from the day I landed in Japan. The minute I checked into the hotel room, Feudie and I wasted no time in dumping all the luggage on the floor and lighting up a cigarette. Aah... the joys of a smoking room.

We headed out after our hoon ki break and the first place we went to was Taito Game Station cos they had a very big prominent signboard. I couldn't help but feel drawn to the place.

The UFO catcher machines have the cutest toys ever. I sighted one which had a freezer installed in it and you could kiap ice cream. Going up to the other levels, there were many of those online card games and one particular section had alot of giant egg capsules where people would sit in one and play some Gundam game. Each capsule came with a big screen, those mecha remotes and an earphone and mike to communicate with your team mates. Makes you feel as though you are really piloting a Mech yourself. Very very cool...

I went up another level and there were pachinko machines all over. Then I sighted one very badass looking machine which I have come to name 'The Mothership'.

Ooooo...

I think it's their most popular in the pachinko parlours. It has the same coin pushing concept as the ones we have at our arcades but you can slot tokens at the side and the machine will suck them in and toss them onto the top layer. Pushing the coins off the 2nd layer will spin the jackpot. Small wins will shower tokens onto your top layer, whereas bigger wins enables you a chance at the Gold Jackpot where they will release a big silver ball in the middle contraption and it moves until it stops and falls into a hole. There are many different holes with different prizes such as Grand Slot, 100 token, 200 tokens, Silver Jackpot & Gold Jackpot.

I was hypnotized by it for a while before I snapped out of it and went up to the top floor where I found this signboard.

What?

Didn't quite get it at first, but later I realised that certain levels of buildings they don't allow men in unless they are accompanied by a lady friend. I suppose they're trying to deter perverts from harrassing the women.

While exploring the different floors, I noticed that there was a smell of tabacco smoke lingering in the air and there were ashtrays positioned at every machine. Holy shit! We can smoke in here! I lit a cigarette and watched the reaction of the people who passed by, a little apprehensive and half expecting to be approached by a staff to be told that smoking was not allowed within the premises. No one batted an eyelid at me nor seem the least bit bothered by my smoke. That's it man. From that moment on, every cig I smoked in the arcade/pachinko parlours, I smoked like I was some seasoned regular local. Nobody could tell I was a foreigner. It was fun camouflaging amongst the crowd.

After leaving Taito Game Station, I spent the rest of the night getting lost. It was pretty intimidating with 9 lane roads and skyscrapers. I couldn't read the map for peanuts. I kept walking past a giant red moving crab signboard and never got to finding the building I wanted to go to. It got to the point where I was too tired and hungry to walk any further that I had to settle for the nearest fast food outlet for dinner. MacDonald's as your first meal on your epic trip! Nice... Well, at least I could smoke and eat at the same time. That pretty much made up for it.

Feudie and I decided to head back to the hotel to rest up for the night and we cut through a lane thinking it was a shortcut back. Kami-sama decides that since I made it all the way to his land just to eat MacDonald's, it was only right that he should reward my sincere efforts. Therefore he sent me a saviour. It was like an oasis in a desert.

There is a God afterall!! ありがとう神様！

I must be in heaven again. Good looking men littered the colourful streets of arcades, karaoke and pachinko parlours. They all looked similar with their shoulder length dyed hair, tall lanky frames and neatly pressed black suits. It's as though you copied and pasted them on the streets.

I started going, "Hay Hay Hay". I was supposed to do it at the airport dammit. I must be lagging from the flight.

So many bishounens! I can't believe our shortcut was through Kabuki-cho! This place... my dear friends... is the source of all my enthusiasm for Tokyo. It is the LaLa Land of the Japanese male escorts. Duck Paradise.

I was so absorbed by the mesmerizing scenery that I blinded followed Feudie towards the direction of the theatre. Feudie was obviously getting drawn to something from a distance as well but it was no duck.

LAS VEGAS. GG.

The famed arcade with all the pros. I know a friend who specially took a bullet train all the way from Osaka just to play with the pros here. I actually found my way here. I went in to tour the place and I must say that the arcade lives up to its reputation. Feudie was to spend every night of the entire trip at this place from then on.

After finally managing to drag Feudie out of the place, we headed back to the hotel room where I practised my S&S combo. That's Soak & Smoke for short. Smoking while soaking in the bathtub. It just doesn't get any better than this.

I slept soundly that night.

Let me stay just a little longer...